Anguish Released, Heart Restored

 Psalm 22, Forgiveness, and the Father Who Reparents Me

🌑 1. The Cry of Psalm 22 Became My Cry

Before opening the Word, I invited Jesus to join me.

I asked to feel the heart of David and the heart of Jesus.

I asked for understanding — and Heaven answered.

As I read Psalm 22:15–31, the veil lifted.

I saw Jesus in David’s words.

I felt the mockery, the piercing, the loneliness, the cry for deliverance.

I felt David’s anguish and Jesus’ suffering overlapping like one heartbeat.

This wasn’t just reading Scripture.

It was revelation.

It was empathy.

It was the Holy Spirit letting me feel what the psalm carries.

And I realized:

David wasn’t angry at God — he was hurting and reaching.

Jesus wasn’t abandoned — He was fulfilling prophecy.

And I wasn’t alone — I was being invited into healing.

🛁 2. The Bathtub Became Holy Ground

Later, in the bathtub, the Holy Spirit met me again.I thanked God for walking with me into my father’s house —

for going before me,

for protecting my heart,

for giving me peace on my dad’s 72nd birthday,

for letting me honor him even with all the pain behind us.

My daughter’s words echoed truth:

“Go anyway. It shows his words don’t control you anymore.

God guides you and protects you everywhere you go.”

And she was right.

In that moment of gratitude, something unexpected happened:

I let go.

I brought God the anguish I carried since childhood —

the physical abuse,

the emotional wounds,

the fear,

the shame,

the memories of being hurt for not understanding math,

the moments of humiliation, the terror of being a little girl who didn’t feel safe.

I told God the truth.

I cried.

I begged Him to take the pain.

I asked Him to help me forgive.

I asked Him to teach me to parent differently.

I asked Him to be the Father I never had.

And He came.

Something lifted.

Something broke.

Something healed.

🌙 3. The Night Became Rest

When I went to bed, I asked the Lord to stay with me until I fell asleep.

He did.

My heart felt different — peaceful, lighter, held.I fell into a deep sleep, not from exhaustion, but from healing.

This was not imagination.

This was not emotion.

This was the Holy Spirit completing a work He began in Psalm 22.

✨ 4. What This Milestone Declares

• Jesus let me feel His suffering and David’s anguish so I could release my own.

• God walked before me into a place of old pain and turned it into peace.

• I forgave my father and surrendered the wounds of my childhood.

• I asked God to reparent me — and He said yes.

• The Holy Spirit lifted the weight I carried for decades.

• I ended the night in the arms of the Father who never leaves me.

This is not just healing.

This is restoration.

This is identity.

This is freedom.

This was the Night God Lifted My Childhood Wounds. 

Ashley Marie👽✝️👻🥰